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The most important tale of Lu Dongbin concerns his journey to the capital to follow an official career in government. During a stop along this trip he met Zhongli Quan, a fabled immortal who was busily warming some wine. Under the influence of Zhongli (and the wine presumably), Lu fell into a deep sleep and had his famous “Yellow Millet Dream.” In this dream, Lu attained his government post and, as a result, accumulated great wealth and prestige. He enjoyed this privileged mortal life for some 50 years until he was accused of a great crime. Found guilty, he was stripped of all property, his family was separated from him, and he himself was banished into the mountains. With this Lu suddenly awoke to find his meal of yellow millet had still not finished cooking; his entire official career had lasted for only a few moments. Realizing that ordinary life is but a fleeting dream, Lu decided to abandon his worldly aspirations and become Zhongli’s disciple, taking the Daoist name Dongbin (“Guest of the Cavern”) as a sign of his new religious life. （182字）

念卍財囬

翻译：
提到吕洞宾，其中关于他的最著名的传说发生在他赴京入仕的途中。进京途中，他遇到了正忙于温酒的钟离权—一位传说中的神仙。在钟离权的影响下（也很有可能是酒的影响），吕洞宾沉沉入睡，这就是著名的“黄粱美梦”故事的由来。
梦里，吕洞宾梦见自己进官封爵，随之而来的是日益增长的财富和威望。他享受了大约半载荣华富贵的凡世生活，直到他因事获重罪，家产尽收，妻离子散，流放于山岭之间。
吕洞宾恍然梦觉，见煮的高粱还没熟；只消顷刻之间，便是一生沉浮光阴。吕洞宾由此感悟，知凡世功名不过都是一场幻梦，于是决定放弃追名逐利的俗念，跟随钟离权学习道法，以“洞宾”（山洞里的宾客）为名，开始了他的修行生活。

与君同醉

The most important tale of Lu Dongbin concerns his journey to the capital to follow an official career in government.
提到吕洞宾，其中关于他的最著名的传说发生在他赴京入仕的途中。（好）
During a stop along this trip he met Zhongli Quan, a fabled immortal who was busily warming some wine.
进京途中，他遇到了正忙于温酒的钟离权—一位传说中的神仙。（好）
Under the influence of Zhongli (and the wine presumably), Lu fell into a deep sleep and had his famous “Yellow Millet Dream.”
在钟离权的影响下（也很有可能是酒的影响），吕洞宾沉沉入睡，这就是著名的“黄粱美梦”故事的由来。
建议：或许是钟离权作法（也或许是不胜酒力），吕洞宾沉沉入睡，做了个著名的“黄粱美梦”。
In this dream, Lu attained his government post and, as a result, accumulated great wealth and prestige.
梦里，吕洞宾梦见自己进官封爵，随之而来的是日益增长的财富和威望。
建议：此处“进官封爵”有点过，他只是“当了官”或“谋得官位”
He enjoyed this privileged mortal life for some 50 years until he was accused of a great crime. Found guilty, he was stripped of all property, his family was separated from him, and he himself was banished into the mountains.
他享受了大约半载荣华富贵的凡世生活，直到他因事获重罪，家产尽收，妻离子散，流放于山岭之间。（好）
半载的意思是半年，而原文是50年。
With this Lu suddenly awoke to find his meal of yellow millet had still not finished cooking; his entire official career had lasted for only a few moments.
吕洞宾恍然梦觉，见煮的高粱还没熟；只消顷刻之间，便是一生沉浮光阴。
“只消”意为“还没发生”，所以不妥，建议删除这两个字。
Realizing that ordinary life is but a fleeting dream, Lu decided to abandon his worldly aspirations and become Zhongli’s disciple, taking the Daoist name Dongbin (“Guest of the Cavern”) as a sign of his new religious life.
吕洞宾由此感悟，知凡世功名不过都是一场幻梦，于是决定放弃追名逐利的俗念，跟随钟离权学习道法，以“洞宾”（山洞里的宾客）为名，开始了他的修行生活。

语言很有功底，译文很耐读。